


The box

by mabomanji



Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Childhood Memories, Friendship, Gen, Wakes & Funerals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-22
Updated: 2014-07-22
Packaged: 2018-02-10 00:53:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2004708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mabomanji/pseuds/mabomanji
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After his mom's funeral Steve goes through all their stuff and finds a box with all his secret treasures that bring back a lot of memories to him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The box

Rummaging through the old stuff left over the years in the shelves he uncovers a little colored box. He recognizes it as his treasure box from when he was younger. He got the box in a junk shop on main street, along with a set of old baseball cards. He doesn’t remember why he wanted this box at the time but he can remember how he filled it, and he smiles a little at the memories coming back to him.

He sits down and takes the box in his lap, opening it with great precaution. He used to open and close it so strongly he can’t help to be amazed that it did survive his treatment.

The lid comes off after a little struggle, the metal is rusted after the years.

He knows exactly what’s in the box.

There is the ticket for his very first time in a cinema. How they skipped school with Bucky to go and see it. It was John Wayne after all in The Big Trail ! The very birth of America. Those settlers were really brave and hopeful to go in the wild like that and start a new life. He always admired that, especially since his parents did the same when they moved from Ireland to the USA. Too bad it didn’t turn out that well. They lived in a very difficult time after his dad’s death and it was hard for him and his mom. They were alone, just the two of them, trying to make do with barely a thing to eat and to dress themselves. His mom was working two shifts so they could pay the debts of his father and still keep on living. He was ashamed of not being able to help her more since his health was very poor.

There’s the first gift he ever received from anyone and it was Bucky who gave it to him. It’s a little toy soldier. He remembers his friend liked it a lot and gave it to him to help reassure him after some bullies had beaten him up. It was the first time Bucky saved him from a uneven fight. One of many more to come.

Bucky was the only one to ever come close to him when he was drawing in the corner of the courtyard in school. As a thank you he drew him as best as he could and offered the drawing to him with a really shy gesture. He still remembers this moment like it was yesterday. He was hoping for once to have a friend, and he saw in Bucky such a radiance, a light that pulled him in. He wanted to be close to him and spend time trying to discover who he was. He always looked poised but he saw him once crying behind the building, unseen from anyone but Steve.

And when Bucky took his drawing and his eyes lit up like it was the greatest gift of his life, he knew he could never let go of him. Ever.

Speaking of drawing there was one of his drawing notebooks as well. He opened it turning every single page. He could pinpoint the moment when he drew every single one of them. Who he was with, well it was easy, most of the time he was alone in a courtyard, or near the river, on a bench or just on the sidewalk. Anywhere he could hide a bit and still have a nice view over the city or his neighbourhood. Nice was a big word to use at that time. It was his home so it felt nice but the people were poor and looking sad. Some kids were playing tricks but he didn’t come close to them because usually he ended being beaten up. He stayed on his own most of the time. Except when Bucky was around. This made a big change in his life. And in his drawings too. He could see just with the drawings when Bucky arrived. The drawings were nice and elaborate already but when Bucky was there he tried different things at his request. He tried drawing planes and machines that fascinated him. Bucky loved playing soldier with other kids on the street. Steve usually looked from a distance but at times he let his friend convince him to come and play. And it was actually fun because Bucky made certain no one was mean to him. He always asked him “Are you enjoying this as much as I am ?” and if the answer didn’t come back in a second or he didn’t seem convinced, Bucky stopped playing at once and got to Steve to inquire about him.

He didn’t want to prevent his friends from having fun so after a few times he always answered in a positive way, forcing his voice to be firm. And by doing so he got to spend some amazing moments just enjoying seeing Bucky have fun. He felt more secure and at ease drawing but these moments playing outside were more precious because he didn’t have to be alone.

There’s a coin just in the corner of the box. It’s silly but it’s the last memento he has from his father. He never quite understood him, he died when he was still young. But he remembers the long nights when his daddy wouldn’t sleep. He let him come to the living room and told him stories of the war. He liked to share those secret night talks with his dad but he was often frightened by what he heard. And the rich and soft smell of alcohol was surrounding them in a foul way. He learned to fear that smell, usually his dad had a presence in his eyes and acted strangely and he ended up going back to his room scared as hell.

His mom always tried to explain to his dad how his stories could be bad for a kid of his young age but daddy thought it was very important for him to know the sacrifices men did during the war, and how it was hell, not some fancy place to show off your muscles.

As a matter of fact, all those stories didn’t stop him to want to go and serve his country. He would enlist at once if he could. Even if his body failed him he would still try.

He looks back at the coin. This one was his dad’s lucky charm. It was the last penny he had in his pocket when he went to war and got embushed. He made it out alive, the only one of his company and always kept the coin as a reminder of the fleeting quality of life.

Now that he is alone it is appropriate to take it back. He closes the box and put it back on the shelf. It’s like closing a part of his life, the part when he was a child and had parents. This is the last thing he had to sort out. There aren’t many things left in the appartment, they never possessed much anyway. The emptiness he feels inside is echoed by the emptiness of the room. His mom used to cook and sew right there on the kitchen table. He always came to her with little gifts and drawings to cheer her up after her long days at work. He inherited her blond hair and blue eyes, at least he’ll still cary something of her with him.

He hears a knock on the door and Bucky comes in, still wearing black. The look of concern on his face doesn’t help him at all. He already tried to convince him to come and live with him. But he doesn’t want that, he wants to figure out his own future and it probably means getting out of here and living closer to the art school he applied for.

Nevertheless it sure feels reassuring to have his old friend there, a known face in an empty appartment at a very sad time. The trip back to his youth he took when he opened the box, brought back a lot of good things and his temper has grown softer since he last saw Bucky.

They try to talk about nothing really but the conversation ends quickly that way.

He can see Bucky sits uncomfortably on his chair, trying to find what to say next. He’s already said everything he wanted to say before so he probably ran out of arguments now.

“I’m okay Bucky” his voice is strong, stronger than he thought it would be. The surprised look on his friend’s face reveals that he too didn’t think he could feel sure of himself at a time like this. “I will be fine so don’t worry” He extends his hand towards Bucky and in it is the little toy soldier he got from him. Bucky let’s a little cry of surprise escape his mouth when he recognizes the toy, he’s smiling now and that’s better than looking grave. It suits him best. That’s what Steve thought when he saw him cry in secret as a boy. He didn’t want to see that sad and lost look on his face ever again. Whatever the cost he would never make him feel sad.


End file.
